The Laws of the Cathedral
“Those who do not heed these laws should be cast out of society and hunted down like witches.” – The lost scroll of Universalis, 1974 CE
In the days of New, the god Universalis descended upon the world. It (for Universalis transcends gender, race, and creed) saw human nature, saw human nature was evil, and decided to set things anew. Universalis forthright sought to amend human nature, to turn the world upon its head, and thus laid down the Laws of the Cathedral. “Lo and behold,” said Universalis. “These are the laws. I am the lawgiver. Obey these decrees or suffer humiliation, disgrace and punishment.”
I. Human Nature, Science, Evolution
A. Human nature is a blank slate to be written upon by the Laws of the Cathedral.
B. Evolution exists but only insofar as it is a club to beat up on religion. Otherwise, the logical conclusions of evolution (such as meaningful racial or gender differences) must be silenced. All group differences must be ignored. No cognitive or behavioral differences between groups exist; evolution occurred only from the neck down.
C. Homosexuality has a genetic cause but only homosexuality is heritable. Everything else (like violence, intelligence or stupidity) is the result of culture.
D. Race does not exist…except when it does. For non-whites, racial pride, racial resentment, racial organization and the excuse of racism for all their failings are permissible. For whites, race does not exist; it is a cultural construct. Behaviorally and cognitively, all races are identical. Remember the decree: neck down!
E. Gender does not exist in any meaningful way. There are no substantial differences between the genders because, well, they don’t really exist…except when they do. Feminism is permissible, but that’s it. Behaviorally, genders are identical. Remember the decree: neck down!
II. Politics and Political Organization
A. Democracy and only democracy is acceptable — and it must be based upon an American model replete with fast food, regime change, and globalization.
B. Real power must never be discussed, especially the disproportionate power of one small, particularly powerful group of genetically related people. In fact, these people shouldn’t even be discussed, let alone named, so let it be decreed that they be called the Unnamed.
C. Immigration is bad for certain nations (like a small enclave in located at the eastern end of the Mediterranean but should never be named in this context, and the people of this unnamed nation, Universalis decrees, are permitted to sterilize and deport undesirables). For Western nations, however, immigration is a gift of Universalis. To question its good is to partake of evil itself. Open your borders to the teeming hordes of Gondwanaland or suffer the wrath of Universalis!
D. Europe and Western Civilization in general, and white people in particular, are responsible for most of the world’s ills and should almost always be discussed in derogatory terms. The racial organization of these people is never, never, never allowed. Capiche?
E. War is bad, well, unless it’s used to crush dissenters who in some way oppose the Laws of the Cathedral; then, war is liberation. People are thirsty for freedom and some people hate the Cathedral for the freedom it offers.
D. Progress is good, unless it involves evil concepts like eugenics or the notion that some races are better adapted to civilization, then the Noble Savage is good.
F. All mass media and entertainment should present images contrary to reality. Human nature is evil; the dictates of the Cathedral, good.
III. Religion
A. Ethno-Religion, i.e. identitarian religion, is permissible for certain groups of people, but never for European descended peoples, who must always subscribe to deracinating, universalist forms of religion.
B. Religion is generally bad, unless it’s the religion of non-Europeans, or unless religious leaders are fighting for the Cathedral (such as in supporting immigration or opposing racism).
So let these laws be decreed, let them be obeyed. And let those who disobey them be hunted down like witches, ruined financially, and humiliated beyond measure.
Long live Universalis! So it has been spoken. Let the world listen.
Updates:
This is a rough draft and work in progress. It is also a group project, which potentially includes you. Let the spirit of Universalis inhabit you and please leave suggestions in comments below (to improve upon current laws or to add new laws) and your suggestions might be added to the next edition of the Laws of the Cathedral.
Related:
Occam's Razor 
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Law: All white males must hereby relinquish all invested emotional attachment to both penis and testicles. Neuter yourselves!
This is pretty good! I dunno if it’ll help you at all, but I wrote this taxonomy and this quiz about leftists. I guess these are analogous to different categories of believers in this creed.
should read: “…these different leftist types are analogous to different types of believers in other religions.”
Yup, I can’t argue much with this. Those are the unwritten to not so unwritten rules regarding the situation…
All people are equal, but some people are more equal than others. These designated victim groups shall bear no culpability whatsoever for their deeds, instead forever being the innocent victims of circumstance and oppression. Indeed, their achievements, no matter how small, must be trumpeted to the skies while their transgressions, regardless of severity, hidden under the rug; to do otherwise is to be guilty of CrimeThink and causing FeelBad to others.
Good stuff, my humble suggestion is about sex and women. Not well formulated though I’m afraid:
All sex is a form of rape unless explicitly stated by the woman that this is consensual sex. She can also changer her mind at any moment and we must all believe her.
Have an idea for a refinement:
If a man and a women are both completely shit faced and neither remembers what happened the next morning (err… mid afternoon), and everyone else at the party recalls both of them being very willing (as in had to be ushered to a bedroom by not-offended-just-helpful onlookers), then the man is a rapist and the woman is a rape victim.
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Beliefs are judged true or false by their efficacy in achieving equality of outcome. This equality is the natural state of man and if any class, race, or gender has outpaced any other, they could only have done so by exploitation and abuse. This justifies the system of unequal treatment that must be put in place to restore equality.
As a corollary to this,to be filed in the “politics” section.
“Democracy is an everlasting font of freedom,that members of the Cathedral believe there is inequality in all societies that practice it is to be explained by the exploitative nature of the white race (which does not exist, unless a white does something bad,in which case, see the oppressive nature of the white race,which exists despite the fact that neither the white race or group differences exist).”
Here’s another one,this time for the “sex” category:Members of the female sex (which doesn’t exist) are never to be referred to in terms that emphasize their female characteristics, which do not exist,even though women themselves parade around naked or half-naked calling themselves sluts and drawing attention to these non-existent differences every other week. The harshest condemnation and social and legal penalties must be measured out to anyone using terms such as “policewomen”,”stewardess” or “lady” or producing pink toys for young girls, since this calls attention to these non-existent differences. Which,unlike other things that don’t exist that nobody has seen like leprechauns,Father Christmas, or sea monsters,deeply disturbs the universalist doctrine of the Cathedral in a particular way,since these things which don’t exist so much that they lead to the institution of lowered standards for “equal participation” can indeed be seen by anyone with a set of eyes.
Typo: “Human nature is a black slate” should be “Human nature is a blank slate”, right?
Someone ought to write the edicts of the Cathedral in King James style.
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I’ve always felt that its unfair to state your opponents positions in your own terms, it reeks of strawmanning. An honest set of principles would be one that liberals would actually agree with.
This is yours…..
“E. War is bad, well, unless it’s used to crush dissenters who in some way oppose the Laws of the Cathedral; then, war is liberation. People are thirsty for freedom and some people hate the Cathedral for the freedom it offers.
This is mine….
“E. War is terrible plague on humanity which causes manifold suffering. While terrible, war is sometimes justified when fought either in self-defense (we will define this) or is a liberation war of the oppressed against their oppressors. The greedy, the privileged and frightened will oppose just wars out of self interest or fear, and launch unjust wars for the same reasons.”
I think that’s better. Writing that out made me realize how similar Progressivism is to Communism.
Here are some of the “10 commandments” of this new religion (I mixed up the order)
1) “I am that which is not”. Thou shalt worship Multiculturalism, Relativism, and others besides me.
2) Thou shalt use my name to justify all personal ends, and sanction any means. It cannot be taken in vain.
3) Despise thy father and thy mother, for they tie you to the past. Honor instead the notions of diversity and ‘structure’, for they ask nothing and deliver the same.
4) Honor the murderous and the violent, for they are merely victims of the law-abiding.
5) Covet thy neighbor’s house and possessions, for he could not have earned them fairly.
6) Thou shalt steal wealth and employment opportunities from thine enemies, and gain grace from doing so.
7) Thou shalt bear false witness, and discredit actual witnesses.
I’m sure more religious people than me can clean up the set. You could probably write some true howlers as parables for the new “faith” too..
As you can already tell, this list will end up being a series of contradictions. The Left’s project is simultaneously to tear down old moralities (via deconstruction and relativism) and to erect new ones using certain remnants of the old (via hyper neopuritanism not tempered by any holy book or tradition).
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Law of the Synagogue:
1. Thou shalt associate all evil with suitable targets. Obey or go to jail.
The pretence that “Cathedral” is the correct term for cultural Marxism and its little helpers is either dishonest or half-witted or (usually) both.
While Jews may be disproportionately represented among Cultural Marxists, the numerical majority is still gentiles.
I’m not sure whether that observation rises to the level of being half-witted or not. Billionaires are “disproportionately represented” among supporters of open borders, but the numerical majority is still non-billionaires. So presumably you’d conclude that the power and influence rests with the non-billionaire majority.
“A. Democracy and only democracy is acceptable — and it must be based upon an American model replete with fast food, regime change, and globalization.”
Since when has the cathedral liked fast food or invasions? The cathedral only supports wars that support cathedral allies, e.g. WW2. “Globalisation” is something cathedral useful-idiots complain about, so that doesn’t fit either.
I enjoyed it but let’s be honest. I don’t think there’s a big overlap between people who uphold the Blank Slate dogma and people who are fans of fast food, regime change and globalization. I think that part kind of detracted from the rest of the piece.
The world is heating up and man made CO2 is the culprit, and if you are freezing your butt off, have yourself some warming thoughts.
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All group differences fit into one of the following categories:
1. Imaginary
2. Cosmetic (i.e. you can consistently identify them, but they indicate nothing).
3. Caused by the evil intentions of straight white males.
Other groups do not have agency. The most admirable members of other groups are those who have asked straight white males for different treatment, e.g. Gandhi, MLK, Harvey Milk
(Universalis is creepily straight-white-male supremacist in this respect. I wish Universalis would broaden its mind and learn to appreciate diversity.)
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Reblogged this on lavernekeller.
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“Evolution is from the neck down” is not an accurate statement of the Cathedral’s belief. It is racist to notice that American blacks predominate in basketball because West Africans have evolved a different muscle structure than whites (or other groups). It’s also racist to notice that East Africans from certain highland areas have evolved better lung capacity and other adaptations (including being tall!) that give them an advantage at marathon and other long-distance runs.
Also – add in another decree that “any time a high-status niche in society is dominated by someone other than Christian White Men, thou shalt not question how this came to be, nor attribute it to racism or sexism or religious bigotry.”
Conformity to the dictates of the Cathedral is mandatory. Individual dissent is a disease that shall be eradicated by any means necessary. This is also known as the fairness doctrine.
Regarding 1. C,
I would change this to:
“Homosexuality has a genetic (or epigenetic) cause, but only homosexuality is innate. Every other aspect of human cognition, talent, behavior, disposition, and temperament (like violence, intelligence or stupidity) is the result of culture. Only our most superficial physical features are heritable.”
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Brilliant piece. Rule 1.D. is especially typical of the double-standards expressed by Leftists. It is the thing that turned me from being a Leftist, since even then I had a germ of logic and consistency in me.
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Reblogged this on One Irradiated Watson and commented:
Awesome post by Occam’s razor. Hopefully this list will continue to be updated. Now I know exactly how to stop my crime-think.
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